Cliches: overused phrases--dead language--often happen in metaphorical language (hackneyed; stale)

 

Original:

Her eyes were like the ocean.

Revisions:

Her eyes were like ocean waves.

Looking into her eyes was like looking at an ocean.

When I looked at her eyes, they were like colored ocean.

Her eyes opened and I saw the Pacific in November.

Storms ran through her eyes.

 

Original:

He was long and lean with a mean streak.

 

Revisions:

Fred was long and lean and had a kind of nastiness about him.

He towered above everyone, and looked mean.

His veins were visible and you had to look up to him, but few did.

He was veiny and tall and liked to yell.

 

Original:

The trees towered above us.

Revision:

 

 

 

Original:

Mrs. Simpson had piercing, blue eyes.

Revision:

 

 

Original:

He ran like the wind.

Revision:

 

 

 

 

 

Original:

Rachel had raven colored hair.

Revision:

 

 

Original:

Her heart was pounding.

Revision: